EPISODE 32: Breaking Your Personal and Financial Ceilings

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THE LOWDOWN

In this special episode recorded on my 36th birthday, I reflect on my recent challenges and aspirations, particularly my goal of buying a house. I discuss the concept of the 'glass ceiling' and how our self-imposed limitations can hinder our growth.

I share my personal journey of overcoming financial constraints and shifting my money mindset to aim higher. Despite fears and uncertainties, I emphasize the importance of continuously pushing past these barriers to create new opportunities. Join me as we explore how to break through our limitations, embrace change, and achieve our dreams.

MENTIONED IN SHOW:

Website: www.lovealwaysjess.com/getstarted

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/love.always.jess

SHOW NOTES:

Episode begins at [00:00:54]

TRANSCRIPT:

[00:00:00] Hello! Today, while I'm recording this episode, it is [00:01:00] my 36th birthday, and it feels good. It feels like a new chapter. I was having breakfast with my sisters this morning, and they asked me what I'm looking forward to in my 36th year, and my only answer was having a house.

And in all honesty, that's been. A rocky couple of months, couple of six months. I've shared it here on the podcast that I am not where I'm at in my savings goal. And also I've been having complications with my upstairs neighbors. And so things just feel

not succinct. I feel as if I'm being forced to make a decision sooner than I'm ready to. And. It terrifies me if I'm being honest. And [00:02:00] so one of the things that I'm currently focusing on is making the decision that I feel will best suit me. Going into this coming year, obviously I don't have all the answers for myself.

I don't have a hundred percent certainty that by the time my lease is up in January, that I will have enough money saved up

the past week. I've been spending some time looking at houses in general, because one of the. Decisions that I'm going to have to make here in the next week is whether or not I break my lease early. And I have grounds to do that, but breaking my lease early requires moving. Does that look like moving into another unit in the complex?

Does it look like buying a house earlier than I [00:03:00] expected? And I think that's one of the things that kind of terrifies me is making a decision out of necessity instead of Actually sitting down and taking the time to Plan things out and that kind of brings me to today's topic where we're going to talk about money mindset

We're going to talk about money mindset probably in the next few episodes And today I want to talk about

this awareness of creating our own ceiling You Now we hear about the quote unquote glass ceiling. We hear all the time, this woman just broke the glass ceiling or they've reached the glass ceiling. And I think there's this concept or this idea that there's only

A certain, that was a really bad word, there's only a certain height or level or [00:04:00] platform or ceiling that we can get to in life.

Whether or not that's based on the career that we're in, the level of education we have, the city that we live in, the people we have surrounding us, there are a lot of different things. that can force us to think I've gone as far as I can or once I get to this specific level or this specific place in my life, I'm not going to be able to go further.

And the sad thing about that is we really don't have limits. I remember, I'm sure you've seen it going around Facebook or Instagram where it says oh gosh, I'm going to butcher the quote. I don't remember exactly what it is. But something about the sky's the limit. And I remember posting it and I remember a guy commenting and being like yeah, the sky is the limit.

[00:05:00] You can't go past the sky. And I remember thinking, but we can, and we have as a society, we've explored the moon, we've sent things to different galaxies and we've been able to explore. different planets and stars and everything out there in space. And when we think of the sky from our atmospherical perspective, we're just talking about the blue area that we see, the white clouds, the sun shining down on us, the moon shining at night, and yes, the moon and the sun are outside of our quote unquote sky, but they are a part of what we look at and consider our sky.

We as a society have explored so much more. We've pushed the limits. We've had space races. We have people living up [00:06:00] in space right now. And that's amazing. And it's mind blowing. And we wouldn't be there if people assumed that the sky was the limit. If people didn't say, Huh. I wonder what is beyond. I wonder what it would be like.

To go and explore Mars. I wonder what it would be like to go and explore Saturn or Uranus or Pluto or any other country, sorry, planet. I'm tired today. I leave for Nashville tomorrow and I got up early for the gym and so my brain's just tired. Anyways. So when we look at our own lives and we set these expectations that Getting to a certain place is the highest that we can go.

We don't leave room for the unknown. We don't [00:07:00] leave room for surprising ourselves. We don't leave room for growth.

For the longest time, I was wondering,

Whether or not I want to move up to a certain level within the company that I work for. My dad always tells me, one day you're going to be CEO. One day you're going to be CFO. And I always thought to myself, do I want to get there?

And it's not that I was, I've been limiting myself. What it's more of is, do I want to take on that responsibility? Do I want to take on the commitment that it is required to be in those positions? And there are days when I'm like, nah, not really. And then there are days when I'm like, that could be fun.

Maybe I'll become controller of North America. Maybe I will become a senior vice president. I don't know. What I do know is that. If I don't set my sights on something [00:08:00] higher, then I'm going to become stagnant.

And I did feel that way for a little bit. But things are starting to shift. I've learned this new growth and this new energy within myself. I'm pushing it further. I'm pushing myself to do things that I normally wouldn't do. I'm relinquishing control on things that I love doing. Because sometimes we have to release certain things in order for something new to come through the door.

And that new thing could be what gets us to the next level. That new thing could be what opens and breaks the ceiling. or pushes us out of our atmospheric level into space and creates that new opportunity and that new mindset and that new thinking so that we can get there. Now you might be thinking, Jessica, what does it have to do with [00:09:00] money?

I think we come into life, obviously we enter this world not knowing anything about money, and then we learn about it as kids. We learn from our parents, we learn from teachers, we learn from family members, we see the goods and the bads of money, we take on other people's opinions, or we form and establish our own.

And some of us might go to school and educate ourselves. or play around on the internet.

And here's the thing.

None of us

are born with the ability to truly understand money. And when we take on other people's ideas and other people's opinions, we can find ourselves stuck in this loop of this is my mindset. This is money. This is what money means to me without actually stopping to think about what it actually does mean to us.

And then when we get [00:10:00] stuck in that loop, And when we're stuck on this

perspective of this is just how it is, we create an imaginary ceiling in our head of this is just the way that life is going to be. This is just the way that money is going to be. And we don't grow and we don't learn and we don't push ourselves to be and do and have better.

And I understand that shifting our mindset around money is not always the easiest thing.

As we talked about last week, when we don't have money, it can be hard to think about what you can do with money.

And if we're struggling to make ends meet, It can be really hard to even try to imagine what is on the other side of that ceiling.

Because we're going to constantly butt up against it and be like, okay, here's the limit. I feel the wall. I feel the [00:11:00] ceiling. I feel the cap and I'm not going to get past this. Now when I started out this year,

I had maybe one to 2, 000 in my savings for my down payment.

And my brain was like, how are we going to do this?

How are we going to save money? When you aren't getting the promotion, when things aren't stable at work, when your rent increased, how are we going to do this? And as of today, first week in August, I've been able to save 15, 000.

And it was because I shifted my mindset from how, from thinking via limitations, to what can I actually do? Maybe I don't meet my goal by January and I don't have the house. That's okay.

If I think that far [00:12:00] ahead, if I think to January, 12 months from now, this is back in January of 2024. If I think 12 months from then to January 2025, if I was thinking that far ahead, My brain was like, there's no way, there's no possible way. I had that ceiling in my head of everything you've done today.

Hasn't gotten you there. So what makes you think that you're going to get there in 12 months?

And I had to shift my mindset. I had to tell myself, look, you're doing something new. You're challenging yourself. You might not succeed, but we're going to try. We're going to put in the effort. We're going to see what our potential actually is.

And so far, have I done the best that I could? No, but I've done a lot more than I would have in the past.

In fact, I've done a lot more than I did in the past.

And [00:13:00] the beautiful thing

is that when I look at that ceiling, when I see January 2025 in front of me,

and I ask myself, will I be able to get there? My answer is I don't know and I'm content with that. But the other beautiful thing that exists when I look at this fictitious ceiling I have in my head is, but I might exceed it. I might surpass it. And I'm going to do everything I can in my power to do that

because that ceiling isn't the limit. That ceiling isn't the end all of end alls. I have opportunities to crush that hole. I have opportunities to extend the goal.

I have to make a decision next week about whether or not I'm breaking my lease or I'm extending my lease.

That's a terrifying, terrifying decision because I have a [00:14:00] ceiling. I have a ceiling that is telling me you're not going to get there. You're not going to succeed. But I also have this strong mental game that's looking at what I've been able to accomplish so far and knowing what potential opportunities I have coming up is telling me, forget about the ceiling.

You've got this. So I want to ask, what ceiling do you have in your head right now? Is it a ceiling for saving? Is it a ceiling for not being able to make more income at your current job or in life in general? Is it a ceiling of limitations on what expenses you can cut back on?

Is it a ceiling on just future dreaming of potential income?

Whatever that ceiling is, I want you to ask yourself [00:15:00] next. What will it take to pass that ceiling? What will it take to pass that threshold that I've created in my mind?

And that might be hard to answer because maybe you haven't sat down and actually looked at things realistically.

Maybe you have a vision in your mind, but you haven't sat down and mapped out that vision. Or maybe you have a limitation and you haven't sat down and figured out how to overcome that limitation.

Maybe your ceiling is, I'm never going to understand how to invest. I'm never going to understand stocks or bonds or mutual funds. And so you just say, it's a hell with it. I'm not going to do anything. I'm just going to leave my money in my savings account. And if you do that, please choose a high yield interest savings account, it'll make you more money off tangent now.

So that ceiling is, my money can't work for me, it can't grow for me, because [00:16:00] I'm not able to invest it into the stock market. And the ceiling is you're not taking the time to grow your knowledge and to gain better education and to play around with it and learn it from trial and error.

But what would happen if you sat down and you put 10 a month, 50 a month, 100 a month. 100

a month is 1, 200 a year. It's not a lot of money. It might feel like a lot because you might be sitting here being like, I'm throwing it away and putting in it, putting it into the unknown

also at the end of the day. That same 1, 200 could be thrown away on food or entertainment or something else. So why not give yourself that opportunity to overcome the ceiling? Why not give yourself the opportunity to change your mindset to [00:17:00] this is going to work for me. I'm actually going to learn this.

I'm actually going to overcome my fear, my misunderstanding, whatever other feeling you're having.

Having that mindset shift, having that,

I guess, a little bit of gumption, I said that word in case it got cut off, gumption, to think outside the box and to challenge yourself and to free yourself from this ceiling that you might be having in your head. It's not fun living with a ceiling. It's good to have limitations sometimes.

But when it comes to our money and when it comes to our money mindset, we want to be flexible. We want to be shifting and growing and continuously changing. Because guess what? Money is always doing that. You have inflation. You have the job market. You have the economy and prices increasing and decreasing and [00:18:00] fluctuations in the stock markets, fluctuations and exchange rates.

Money is constantly growing and shifting and changing forms. We've seen that with crypto and EFTs or whatever the other, I don't know them off my head, the top of my head. But basically, Money is constantly on the go. Money is constantly changing. It is not static. And we don't want to keep our mindset static.

Because when we keep our mindset static, we don't grow with money. And then we find ourselves sometimes in situations where we're shut out a lot. I know that I've been there myself. And I fricking hate it, which is why I personally am learning how to play with investment. I'm learning more about the stock market and paying more attention to my finances.

Because, as I declared this morning with my friends, [00:19:00] I, in the age of 36, in the next 12 months, am going to own a house.

And I can't play small anymore. I can't play small and be fearful of a 10 or 13 percent rent increase at my apartment complex. I have to fight for myself. I have to fight for my rights. I have to have conversations with management about how unfair it has been for me to live beneath these neighbors for the past six months.

I have to grow and surpass that ceiling there. I am not a confrontational person, but I have to grow in that. I am the type of person who would sit still and just deal with it and power through. But no, I shouldn't have to. I am the type of person that has to start to learn what it takes to own a house.

Start to not be afraid of a high mortgage, which is definitely going to cost more than what I pay currently in rent. I have to not be afraid of [00:20:00] these things. while simultaneously being afraid of these things. Because the fear is going to propel you. But the courage to learn and grow and change, that's gonna, that's gonna get you far.

It's gonna make your dreams come true. It's gonna break the ceiling. It's gonna keep raising that ceiling so that you can continue to raise your potential.

It's not always easy. It's not always fun, but reality is we have a ceiling, we all have a ceiling, and the question we have to ask ourselves is, do we want to bump up to that ceiling and stay there? Do we want to feel crowded? Do we want to feel limited? Or do we want to get out there and do we want to crush it and surpass the ceiling and make our dreams come true over and over and over again?

And I'm willing to bet you're in the group that wants to continue to grow and see that [00:21:00] change and surpass that ceiling. So if that's you, let's go! Really? Let's go. Let's do this. I know I'm chasing it. I know that I'm fighting for it. I don't want to make the adult decision next week about what to do with my life.

I wish somebody could sit me down and be like, This is what you're gonna do. This is how you're gonna accomplish it. But that's not reality.

I pray that you take the time today You take the time tomorrow to become familiar with your ceiling and then ask yourself, is that where I want to stay? Is that the mindset that I want for the rest of my life? And I hope you say no. If you say yes, all the power to you. I still love you, but I hope you say no.

And then I hope you figure out what it's going to take to crush that ceiling

because there's beauty and [00:22:00] fun and awe on the other side of that. You've got this. Go out there and crush your goals. Go out there and break your ceilings over and over again. Continue growing and shifting and changing your mindset. It's going to get you further in life. 100 percent guarantee it.

I believe in you. You've got this. Love you all. [00:23:00]