EPISODE 8: Making Your Money Journey Your Own

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THE LOWDOWN

Hey everyone, Jess here! In our latest episode of "Sex and Money with Jess," we dove into the empowering world of personal finance. I shared insights on how to carve out your own financial path, emphasizing the importance of making decisions that resonate with your unique life story and goals.

We discussed the common trap of following others' financial advice without considering if it aligns with our personal dreams and circumstances. While financial advisors are valuable for their expertise, I reminded listeners that they only see parts of our financial puzzle. As a money coach myself, I admitted that even I seek professional advice, but ultimately, we are the ones responsible for our financial choices.

I shared a story about a friend's dilemma between choosing a high-yield savings account and a credit union offer, highlighting that there's no one-size-fits-all solution in finance. We explored the idea that financial gurus like Rich Dad Poor Dad or Dave Ramsey offer perspectives based on their experiences, but it's crucial to filter their advice through our own life lens.

The episode encourages listeners to ask themselves what they truly want from their financial journey and to seek knowledge to make informed decisions. I stressed the importance of taking responsibility for our financial choices, as they shape our journey and teach us valuable lessons.

We also touched on the dynamic nature of our financial paths, how they can change direction based on new life events or goals, and the power we have to rewrite our financial narratives at any point.

I want you to enjoy the process, learn from it, and get excited about the future they're creating. I believe in the power of personal responsibility and the joy that comes from making our financial journey our own.

Remember, your financial journey is unique, and I'm here to support you every step of the way. Let's continue to grow and thrive together. Can't wait to catch up with you all in the next episode. Until then, keep dreaming big and taking charge of your money story!

MENTIONED IN SHOW:

Website: www.lovealwaysjess.com/getstarted

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/love.always.jess

SHOW NOTES:

Episode begins at [00:00:54]

TRANSCRIPT:

[00:00:00] Hello, welcome to another episode on Sex and [00:01:00] Money with Jess. Today I want to talk about making the money journey that you're on your own.

It's very easy to get caught up in what other people are telling you to do, but the thing is, is they are not you. They don't know what your dreams, your goals, your past, any of that looks like. They are looking at your financial situation from their own lens, their own perspective, their own life story.

The only people that I would suggest listening to are financial advisors. And again, financial advisors are only looking at pieces of the puzzle. They aren't looking at every little thing in your life. But They do have historical [00:02:00] knowledge on finance. They've been in the world for a long time. Even myself as a money coach, I don't know all the ins and outs of investments or retirement.

And so I even seek out financial advisors to assist me because I don't have all the answers. But

seeking professional help when it comes to your finances is helpful. And it's also important to recognize that you at the end of the day are the one making the decision to do what you want to do with your money. Someone can advise you what to do. Somebody can suggest, Hey, this is what I would do if I was in your situation,

but ultimately you're responsible. You're the one who has to call the shots. And that can be scary. But also empowering.

Think about it this way. You're making a decision to buy a house [00:03:00] similar to me, or to put your money into investments. Or maybe you're deciding between paying off a credit card or buying a new car. Or maybe you're deciding to pay down your student loans. Ask for a raise at work, or even just which bank account to decide to choose between because different bank accounts offer different interest rates, benefits, etc.

Everybody's going to have their opinion. I had a conversation with a friend recently where I mentioned to them to put their money into a high yield interest bank account. And I also mentioned to them that I tend to bank with credit unions. Because they tend to have better benefits for their clients.

And so, I had sent them both the bank information that I used, and the credit union was offering

a [00:04:00] money back thing if they were to put their money in their bank. I think they'd get something like 3, 700 after a few months.

I responded to them saying I would go with the high interest yield because you're going to make more money over time than the 3, 700. Yeah, the 3, 700 would be quick, but that's my opinion. They responded back to me with, what if I did both? And I'm like, absolutely. Do what you want to do with your money. I have thoughts.

I have opinions on how I would handle my money. It doesn't make it right. Just like, Rich Dad Poor Dad isn't 100 percent right or Dave Ramsey isn't 100 percent right or whoever else you listen to The Financial Feminist Anybody else? Everybody's coming at things from their perspective from what they've learned [00:05:00] from What they've seen work and not work in their own personal life, and that's okay Nobody's wrong

what you have to decide for yourself Is, from the information you are receiving, what makes the most sense for your money?

So some things to ask yourself is, one, is the person you're talking to, the person you're listening to, a trusted source?

Have they walked a similar life to yours? Is their future, or even their current life, Something that you want to emulate. You know, I often talk to my parents about some financial decisions that I'm trying to make and I'll get their opinions.

Or I'll talk to my partner and I'll weigh options and

I will decide for myself at the end of the day, what makes more sense for where I am [00:06:00] headed.

Every once in a while I'll come across like a Facebook post, Instagram post of somebody suggesting like a financial way to do something. And I look at it and sometimes I'm intrigued and I'm like, Oh, I want to try that. I want to see how it works for me. And it's okay to try things as long as it's not, Going to hurt you in the long run.

Right now, I believe I said it on a previous podcast, I'm playing around with stocks. Me putting 100 into a stock account every single month isn't going to hurt me financially.

Now if I were deciding to put 1, 000 in there a month, that would be a different story. There'd be a lot more risk involved. It would definitely impact my finances. And so that's not something that I'm choosing to do. And I might talk to Joe Schmo down the street who would say, yeah, [00:07:00] but you're not going to get the bang for your buck unless you're putting in 1, 000.

Because 100 is going to grow you 10, 20, maybe 30 bucks in the long run. But 1, 000, that'll grow you 100, 200, 300 in the long run. So you're going to get more money. If you invest more and while he may not be wrong, I have to look at my life and I have to say what does the next year, three years, five years look like for me?

What do my current expenses compared to my current income look like for me?

Is this something that I can risk putting a thousand dollars into different stocks right now?

If it doesn't hurt me currently, and I'm still able to pay my regular bills, put a little bit in savings, then sure, I might do that. But [00:08:00] that risk and reward that could happen from putting 1, 000 into an investment account doesn't feel right in my soul. Even if it were my financial advisor who told me to do that, I could take his thoughts and opinions.

And I could follow through with it. But say something happened down the road in two or three months, where I got laid off, or an unexpected expense came up.

I'm the one who made the decision to put the thousand dollars in there. So I can't blame him when shit hits the fan. Which is why it's important for you to recognize that you're the one calling the shots. You're the one making the decision. And in my instance, I'm not ready to risk tying up my money like that, especially when I don't fully know and understand investments, because I haven't played around in it as much as I would have [00:09:00] liked to.

So I'm putting a low risk.

I'm playing around, trying it out. You might want to

put your money into a CD, or maybe work is offering like a employee stock plan, and you want to put your money into that, and you want to play around with your money. It's okay to try things. It's okay to see what does and doesn't work.

But when you make that decision to try it, You're responsible and you can't say, well, my coworker put in the max amount. So I'm going to do the same thing. Trust me. There are looking back at my employer's stock plan. When I first started with the company in 2013, when the, um, stock plan thing rolled around, I said, I don't have the money right now, so I'm not going to do it.

Some of those years paid out 20, 30, 15, 12, 000. And I was like, gosh darn [00:10:00] it, I really missed out. I could have asked my parents to borrow the money,

but I can't get mad. Hindsight is 20 20, I can't go back and change it. But for the years that I did invest, I'm excited to see what the payouts are.

And then I'm excited to make a decision on what to do with those payouts. Do I pay out my student loans? Do I put it in a bank account for a down payment for my house? Do I go on a trip with it? Like, the sky is the limit as far as making the decision. But we have a personal responsibility when it comes to our finances.

We also have this unique thing of our own journey.

Where you were yesterday, a year ago, five years ago, doesn't have to continue to be your story. At any point in time, you can make the decision to change it. Just like everything else in [00:11:00] life, it is not a set in stone, it has to be this way for the next 100 years. We see the stock market go in its ebbs and flows.

We see billionaires make the wrong investment and lose all their money. We see people who didn't have the greatest upbringing grow up and make a fabulous living for themselves. Start a great company.

So many things can change. And the journey that you're on isn't straight and narrow. You can decide to turn left at any point. You can decide to go right at any moment in time.

And as you're traveling along that road, as you're journeying through life, New things are going to come up and you're going to say, Hey, what I've been doing for the past five years doesn't work for me anymore.

I've decided I want to retire [00:12:00] early. So I need to button down the hatches, tighten things up, rein myself in, and get things into a nice little neat package so that I can save as much as possible. invest as much as possible

and get myself to early retirement.

Or,

you know, maybe graduating college, your focus was on paying off your student loans. And then 10 years later, you started having children of your own. And you were like, college is damn expensive. I've been there. And I don't know if my child's gonna want to go to school. But I'm going to start the process now to set my child up for success so that they don't have to take out the same student loans that I did.

Whatever your story may be, your journey is unique to you, which means that your financial journey is unique to you as [00:13:00] well.

One of the best things you can ask yourself is, what do I want? What do you want?

Not, what does my father want for me? Not what does my coworker think I should do with the employee stock plan?

What do I want? What do you want? What do you and your partner want?

Or even What do I not want to be? What do I not want my finances to look like? Ask yourself those questions.

And then from there, ask yourself, Do I know enough to get there? Do I know enough of what I need to do with my money in order to make X, Y, and Z happen? If so, great! Take that knowledge. and figure out your next steps. If not, then spend time learning about what it takes to get there.

Hop on a call with [00:14:00] me. Let's talk through it.

Get yourself a trusted financial advisor. Talk to a mentor. Go meet with somebody at a bank and say, hey,

tell me about your programs. Begin to educate yourselves on where it is that you want to be

and then use that knowledge to make an informed decision.

One of the biggest things that I ask clients is what do you want the outcome to be

because when we know where we're headed, we then can figure out a path from where we're at to where we're going.

And the great thing about that path is because it's your own journey and your own choice. At any point, you can say, this isn't working for me. I am changing the direction I'm going.

Sure, maybe you put your money into a five year CD and you can't take it out of that CD for another five [00:15:00] years. That's okay. We pivot in other ways. Or maybe you invested in crypto like I did and lost money. That's okay. You pivot in other ways.

We can always say, This is the direction I'm going. This is the way that I'm doing it.

This is where I'm at.

And at any point, we can say yes or no.

And then continue forward with our decision. And we can't blame anybody else. Because we made it ourselves. And that is so empowering. It's empowering to know. That where you are headed, you yourself are making happen. You might take the advice of a financial advisor. You might talk to a trusted source and get their opinion, but you are doing it yourself.

You are headed towards your financial future that you want on the days that you [00:16:00] falter, pick yourself back up and continue going. You're not going to be perfect. God knows I'm not.

We all make decisions. In the moment, forward thinking, past lessons learned, everything is constantly spinning and informing the choices that we make.

It's scary, it's beautiful, it's life.

Pause for a moment, think about where you're at,

then ask yourself, where do I want to be in a year, in two years, in five years,

and go from point A to point B. And ask yourself, what do I need to do to get there? Do I need to educate myself more? Do I just need to buckle down and do it?

And then start the process. Begin enjoying that journey. For some of us, that journey may be boring.

Maybe it means you don't travel for a year. [00:17:00] Maybe it means Eating Out Last, whatever that journey means for you,

find ways to enjoy it, find ways to get excited for where you're going, and then start daydreaming about what your life is going to look like when you get there, because you'll get there, I believe in you. It may not look 100%, but you'll get where you're going when you decide for yourself that I want my story to change.

I want to take responsibility for where I'm going. The change will happen. The growth will happen. It'll be hard. It'll be fun. There will be tears. But you'll get there. And when you do, you'll celebrate.

So enjoy the process.

Ask yourself the questions. Learn. Figure out what you want your life to look like. And make this financial journey your own. Because at the end of the day, it's just you. Or maybe you and a partner. And it's exciting. [00:18:00] Money is fun. Money is exciting. I think we get caught up in the, I'm not there yet conversation.

And in reality, when it comes to money, none of us are there yet. I'm sure Warren Buffett even wants to do more with his money. Whether or not it's for philanthropy or generational wealth, somebody somewhere is always thinking about the more with their money. That I'm not there yet. I can do better. We're all in the same boat.

But setting that aside and saying, I'm here now. I've done great things with my money up to this point. Whether or not that means your money has kept you alive via the basic needs of a human being, or you've been able to take your family on a Disneyland trip, go down to Mexico for a family reunion, fly to Paris [00:19:00] to propose to your partner.

Even the small things of a weekend camping trip, whatever You've been able to do with your money up to this point is fantastic. We're human. We get to enjoy life and we get to celebrate what money has been able to do for us up to this point, even if it's negative money in the sense of debt, credit card, student loan, medical, whatever.

Money has been there for us. It's just the stories and the energy that we put towards certain things as a society that makes it good or bad.

But we should be thankful towards money. We should be thankful towards the journey we've taken to this point because it's taught us lessons. It's given us happy moments.

It's given us highs and lows. It's reminded us what is important in life. Money is just an [00:20:00] energy. It's neither good nor bad. It's a part of our life. It's a part of our story. It's a part of our journey. And , when we remind ourselves Our journey with money is just that the journey. We get to change the narrative whenever we want.

Don't have to stay stuck. We don't have to hold resentment, we don't have to feel shame. We get to ask for raises and promotions. We get to plan a vacation and trust me, I've planned plenty of vacations that I've canceled. Because the money wasn't there right then and then.

But that doesn't take away the excitement that I got from planning the trip. That doesn't mean that the trip's never going to happen. My priorities changed. Things in my life happened that made me decide I'm not going to take that trip. COVID. And then I was excited to go to Costa Rica [00:21:00] again. And my mom passed away.

And I couldn't bring myself to leave the country. It didn't feel right.

Things happen, life happens, we can plan all we want, but our journey is going to hit road bumps,

and it's exciting to see where those road bumps lead to. So look at your journey. Where you've been, where you've come from, and where you're going, and get excited

to plan for what you want to do

because it's gonna happen in one way or another.

Believe in your journey. Believe in yourself. Have fun. That's all I have for you today. I hope that the rest of your week goes wonderfully, and I'm excited to talk to you again next week. Have a wonderful, wonderful rest of your day. Love you all. [00:22:00]