Money Fears
Recently I went to pay my auto insurance renewal in a lump sum payment instead of monthly installments; I began investing money in the stock market; I purchased plane tickets for a work trip / vacation. With all of these decisions, a feeling of fear took over me as I went to push the payment button.
What am I doing?
$800, $100, $1,200, they are all large payments I am making.
Am I sure this is what I want to do? What if I need that money for something else?
You might be thinking to yourself, really, fear over those small payments? Get over it and push pay already.
The reality is that fear comes in various forms. It comes every month when I go to pay my rent. It comes when I am deciding what stock to invest in as I could lose instead of gain. It comes when I want to go enjoy Disneyland with my friends, but realize a day at the park is expensive.
That feeling of fear may stem from scarcity, an unknown future, or traumas from the past.
All I know is that it is normal, and if you find yourself feeling the same…
the redness on your face, the heavy rock in your gut, the sweaty hands, and the tunnel vision that comes from making a simple, but seemingly difficult decision about your finances,
you are NOT alone.
I spend my time talking about money constantly. One, I’m a finance director at a corporation, and two, I help other people talk through their personal finances. I love money and can often see things from various perspectives, but even still, I get fearful.
How can we stop this fear?
I personally do not believe that the fear factor ever truly goes away. We can read books on how to be a badass at making money. We can work with mindset coaches and meditate. We can write letters to money, future think, be optimistic, and lean in to all of the various self-help modalities out there.
However, the biggest takeaway I have ever had is to acknowledge that fear and thank it.
In her book, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear, Elizabeth Gilbert says this, “…You’re allowed to have seat, and you’re allowed to have a voice, but you are not allowed to have a vote. You’re not allowed to touch the road maps; you’re not allowed to suggest detours; you’re not allowed to fiddle with the temperature. Dude, you’re not even allowed to touch the radio. But above all else, my dear old familiar friend, you are absolutely forbidden to drive.”
Let fear into the car, after all it’s doing its job, trying to keep you safe. Let it come along for the ride and watch as you grow, blossom, and build your future one difficult decision at a time.
As you continue to make these hard decisions, fear is going to gain its own strength. It’s going to learn that it too can persevere and conquer the things it once thought unfathomable.
Fear is going to look at your finances alongside you and say, “that’s the old me talking, sorry for making your palms sweat there buddy. I know we can do this!”
Whether the decision you are faced with is paying your auto insurance all up front in a lump sum payment, quitting your job for a new one, starting your own business, or taking a month off to travel, fear will always be present.
It’s a part of life.
It’s a human expression.
Embrace it and see how far you can go.
